What do "the Holidays" feel like?
This is honestly my favorite time of year, which is surprising to a lot of people close to me.
When I think about what the holidays looked and felt like when my son was small, it was quite different. A LOT of family time, a lot of gifts and wrapping and so much food. I have always loved Christmas music and all the lights and the "holiday cheer." I loved playing Santa and all the performances, but what I don't miss was the pressure.
This year, I am being repeatedly reminded that the holidays don't always feel cheerful to everyone.
For some people, its a reminder of loss. Its a lot of pressure for women at the head of a family - the Christmas pictures and holiday cards and school parties and recitals and concerts and visitors and travel plans and so much cooking. There's a point in a women's life when she is managing the kids and the grandparents, and I know so many women who are there right now. They aren't necessarily feeling a ton of "Holiday cheer."
But this is why I do what I do, so I listen.
It allows me to understand the people I serve better, and get to the root of why so many people feel like they are never enough. That feeling is often addressed with excess - more food, more shopping, more decorations - a strive for perfection that is impossible because it is an illusion. There's no such thing as a perfect holiday, and in trying to create one, we often lose ourselves.
Let this message be a reminder that this time of year is about slowing down, not doing more. Appreciate the people you have in your life, celebrate the last year with them, but most importantly - make sure your people are the ones you want to bring into 2026 with you. There's no right way, you dont have to do anything, but certainly not all the things. Don't forget service - there are people who have so much less than you, who find joy in the ability to have any time off to enjoy each other's company.
Most importantly - don't subscribe to the illusion of perfection. Its nonsense, truly.
If getting to a place where feeling like you are "enough" is something you're struggling with, I invite you to join me in Dominican Republic this February. I have 4 spots left, only 1 single room, and an amazing team of teachers to help you embody self-love and gratitude for the privilege of this life. You'll get to feel what it's like to have slow mornings, time to think, no need to cook or care for anyone - not even yourself - so you can know what it feels like to have some freedom. If freedom from illusion is something you're searching for, you can learn more about our retreats below. For the rest of this month, we are offering an extra $500 off for service providers and caretakers - DRs, Nurses, Teachers, EMT workers, servers, etc. If you need an escape, we have a retreat for you. You can secure a space with a $250 deposit using the link below.
I hope you find the time and space to reflect this season. I pray you can slow down and find joy in the lights and the music, regardless of where you are in your life. Where your attention goes, energy flows, and right now - we have the scaffolds built in. Even if it's just for a moment, be grateful you get to live another year.
With all the love in the world,
Daniele
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